Happiness


Happiness is less about a series of momentary pleasures, and more about enduring passions.When our passions are cultivated in the right context, they bring a satisfaction to our lives. This can only be found when we are no longer distracted by or desire the wrong things.

Happiness comes from social connection, being mindful of being in a state of acceptance and gratitude, and in contributing towards something meaningful – a greater good. It doesn’t mean that we don’t ever feel negative emotions – on the contrary, negative emotions are an essential guidance system to provoke change away from things that do not bring us happiness, towards those things that do. In fact, attempting to seek happiness all the time is damaging to one’s overall wellbeing – we become arrogant, narcissistic and socially undesirable. That doesn’t work too well towards developing social connection.

You can see and feel happiness in the body – an overall energy, and from the eyes, particularly the muscles that surround the eyes. Recognising when you are experiencing positive affect is a guideline as to what makes you happy – the key is in understanding why. And that takes mindfulness, and then prioritising those elements of our lives that induce that state.

Happiness results in longer life expectancy. Being happy earlier in life can add 5-7 years; and boosts of happiness in later life can add up to 20 months. This is because we are less likely to have fatal accidents or develop diseases, and more likely to survive cancer.

The Key Drivers of Happiness

~ fifty percent (50%) of the variance in happiness is due to our genes.

~ ten percent (10%) lies in our life circumstances;

~ (40%) of happiness, is under our control, under our power to change.

We are each born with a happiness set point – an intrinsic trait. When we pursue something extrinsic towards ‘making us happy’ we do experience a boost in happiness for a while, from both the satisfaction of success and in possession of the ‘goal’ but then gradually return to our set point. We then have to pursue something we think will make us even happier – and we get caught into a manipulative cycle that does little to sustain overall life happiness. They key is to select the right goals – ones that have meaning, involve engagement with other people, and contribute to something outside of yourself, what we call the greater good.